You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
