Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
zippers are such a cool invention
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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