college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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