We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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