I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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