i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
