I'm lost and stupid without you.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Randomize
