And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Are we in a gay sports bar?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Bring me that man meat
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
