Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
