Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Randomize
