Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
He felt like a one man threesome
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
