i think my mom watched the whole time
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize