We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I think a kid would responsible me up
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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