I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
