I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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