somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
