sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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