What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
