She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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