pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize