I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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