it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
