I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize