glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
