My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
