she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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