i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
