Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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