like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
