Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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