he wants to bone in the snuggie
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
