I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
