I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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