Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
