There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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