HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
