I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
