Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
