he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
