She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
