We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
