That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
