Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I just gargled with NyQuil
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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