if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
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