Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
