In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
