I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
