Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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