And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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