why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
