Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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