Christians are straight up FREAKS
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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