I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
